Monday, April 16, 2012

One Day at a Time

You will never believe what I read today. 80 out of every 100 babies (that's 4 out of 5!!!) conceived with Down's do not survive. Many are miscarried, or do not make it to term because of their health, or if they do make it to term - they cannot survive outside the womb because of their health. That means that if we flipped a coin on Sam's life - 80 out of a 100 times, he wouldn't exist...he wouldn't be here.

These past few days have been really good - like REALLY good. I have not shed one sad tear for four days straight. I'm seeing my son and our path in a whole new light. I'm not naive nor am I in denial, I know we've got some tough days ahead of us - but today is Monday, and that's all that matters. I'm reading a new book called "Bloom" by Kelle Hampton, and it's a memoir on the first year of her daugher's life with Down syndrome. This book has really enlightened me on the everyday stuff associated with Down's - it's not a textbook that warns me of this ailment or that concern - it's just a normal mom who felt everything I feel. She makes me feel ok with the emotions we've experienced - not to mention she's hilarious, with her ass-kicking attitude toward's Down's. I can only pray that I can be the advocate for my son, that she is for her daughter - truly amazing!

I've said "we're taking it one day at a time" and we are. I have to remind myself of this...daily. There are so many things that the "textbooks" are telling me to worry about...

The books tell me that Sam has an increased risk of developing leukemia as a child, but today he's cancer free.
The books tell me that Sam had nearly a 50% chance of being born with a major heart defect - but his heart is PERFECT.
The books tell me that Sam could have had gastrointestinal problems - but he can poop like it's NO ONE's business!
The books tell me that Sam might have vision problems down the road - but when he looks me in the eye, I know he sees me,
and although that could change, today - he sees as much as he should at 3 weeks old.
The books tell me that Sam may have dental problems - but for today, he has a perfect toothless grin.

That's not all....the list goes on and on. But you know what? - today, Sam is healthy. Sam is a hungry little wiggle worm, and doing all the things we expect him to do as a newborn baby. He kicks and flails his arms, he follows things with his eyes, he startles when his sisters squawk and scream - today, life is good. One day at a time. Today. Tomorrow, well - let's talk about tomorrow sometime after midnight.

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